Clue to my Survival

18th March, 1989

Remember that serial named Fauji? It used to be telecast-ed on Wednesdays Prime Time at DD- Metro, back then? Yeah, Shah Rukh Khan had debuted his acting career with that particular one.

Maybe this remained at the back of my mind when I dreamt of this:

I was playing in my GFPS ground. I had worn my school uniform- white shirt and sky blue skirt. The belt and no tie. I didn’t use to wear one. It was exempted for me. I ran around on the compound where the K.G and 1st standard classes were. After we moved to the “new building” as it was referred to as, those adjoining classes were gone.

Running around after Himanshu, I had suddenly heard a Jet Plane. I even saw it dropping a bomb (?!!!?) I had ran towards him and pushed him afar. No points for guessing- the bomb had exploded on me 😀

I didn’t die though..

The same evening, I was invited to his Uncle’s place for his B’de celebration. We had watched the movie QSQT that was released the same year. That had also ended on a tragic note. Somewhat on a similar note. First Juhi (Rashmi) gets hit with a bullet and then Aamir (Raj) kills himself over her. Oh yes, I had sat crying there as well!!

What a sentimental fool I have been..

I had excused myself to wash. His mom had asked me if all was well..!! A detailed one of his B’de Bash would be included in my Biopic Log shortly. Just that recalling of my childhood time spent with him, puts me into the same long lost Love mood again. I was all of 12 back then.

I guess, this dream was a clue of the forthcoming stances. Things that have made me go indifferent, the cold blooded way.. That no matter how much I may be running after Himanshu; he would never be with me. And that he would surely “escape”; should I be wanting any help.

Yet, I would survive.

I have; how else would you be reading this otherwise..??


Divine Desires

Sitting in solitude,
mumbling in silence;
often, I dreamt
of becoming the Divine.

Attaining super- conscience,
dwelling through timelines,
raising above the mundane;
I’ll sit stoned and laugh within..!!



Wanting to become Indifferent; Enjoy life and yet not get affected..
Wanting to become God, Get chiseled into a Divine figurine..
Wanting to become Stone, so nothing affects me..
Wanting to Be Me; laughing while watching all..


More of these shots

My entry for Week 28 Poets Rally

Stepping Stone

Who says you can’t do it..?

Who say- you’ve lost it all..?

It is all within your Mind

To create a Whirl..

Duality exists in every possible matter

Both in Tangible and In-tangible

It is all upto you

To work it out to your ‘vantage.

Tough it is to sail through

Make it worthwhile when you do..

You are already facing its ugly side

Don’t forget to notice the lighter view..!!

It takes both good and bad

To balance all situations that makes you travel through..

It is to you what you do

How you come out of it as a Winner..

Effort is all that is required

To distinguish between Merge and Emerge

“Take all in your stride..”

“Make them your patented Experiments..”

“Draw your notes, reach a conclusion..”

Challenging the situation, scaring it away..

Make it your slave so it works for you

Towards your betterment; crafting a Newer You-

It’s bound to Leave you and refreshed

Shining you like an Eternal Star..


Note: Steps go both Upways and down- wards; it’s upto you which way you walk.. It’s your attitude that would make you either get crushed or crush the situation. Make your Limitation, your the Stepping  Stone; Emerge as a Winner.


Walking through the waste land-
For ages; all alone,
I have lived in the cemetery;
Buried deep within.

I have watched over Nothing,
Waiting for no one..
My existence is scarred-
Walking through the Deads.

I dwell at nights-
In Dark desolation.
I croon the songs of despair
With notes of melancholy.

I shadow everyone around..
There’s no way of Escape
Or Walking past Me, For I am now the
Will and Vendetta rules Me..


Related Posts

– Posting it for One Stop Poetry

I am the Wind


I so don’t wish to be a Kite
Being strung at my tail..
I don’t wish to be a plane-
Carrying the burden of thousand people.


I don’t want to be a Bird,
Spending my Life looking for food and water..!!
I don’t wish to be the Whiff:
It fades with travel..

I am tired of being a dried Leaf,
It disintegrates with displacement.
I don’t wish to be a free spirit,
Getting chained at Human emotions.

I want to travel unbound..
Like I have, so far.
Giving a lift to the travelers..
Never halting in the process.


I wish to become the Essence,
I wish to be giving Life.
I wish to clean the dead Air..
Transporting the Cranes,
I wish to support the broken feathers-
For all to know that they still fly.

I want the Fire to rise
So the flame engulfs all ugly..
I wish- Tides to be borne
So it cleanses all impurity.


I wish to become all pervading
Want to sustain Life
Becoming the Giver
.. ‘Cause I am the Wind
I fly unbound
I am Intangible and Infinite.

I am within and yet unconceivable
I am all around;
Yet stay untouched.
You can feel me
Rejoicing with me
Or, mourn about
Reading the message
Don’t miss my words-

To stay unaffected and fly undeterred,
Remaining completely un-merged.


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