De-delusioned

~*~*~

~*~*~

I tried as much to hold up,
have failed to, sit I curled up.
Within the debris of broken dreams-
I look for me where you once lived.

Fallacies broken it’s barren again,
lost the bid this one bargain.
Wandering along the memories created,
I’m watching the corpses of my emotions.

Was that a pretension of what was fake?
Why did I make those if to break?
Stillness of void screams its last;
was it ever indeed love?

Ruins of days spent together,
shards embedded deep forever-
empty windows stares in me;
carving hollows over my being.

Illusions dark webbing my space,
skeletal remains of your embrace,
haunt me when I’m wide awake-
jolt me as I get carried away.

Was it real or is it now?
Wonder I knew then again how?
It was me who designed this maze,
then why I didn’t stay lost in its confines?

Doesn’t even matter no longer I miss-
don’t yearn for you or your kiss.
Silently I continue to breathe as if
keeping awake; pretending asleep!

Myth I created you rejoiced no end,
then scratching away beyond any amend.
Convenience, lies, ignorance ruled-
all that I believed to be half truth.

Was I blind or now being so?
Finally aware or yet to know?
Feel entrapped in veils of romance.
Was that me or is this now?

Distance I travelled dried up my tears,
patched me through my greatest fears,
delivering to me a newer version;
you chiseled new hopes into me.

Just when I had begun to smile,
wishing to walk with you a mile,
you dropped me to get parched again
as if we weren’t meant to be!

Was that you or still make believe?
I loved you enough then why deceive?
I gave you myself on your terms,
Then why did you leave me under a spell?

I want to believe you not anymore.
I’ll attempt to throb with the heart your tore.
Scars on my face resembles your image,
reminding me of you even when I don’t.

Leave me alone, go away forever.
A happily ever after or whichever,
without any assumptions or conditions,
I want your affection; not affectation.

~*~*~

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My In- Mind Whirls Writes

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