Prophesied by a Nightmare!

I had slept at 1.30am last night. I didn’t doze off immediately. It must have been way past 2.00am before I may have fallen asleep. Yet, I was awake at 6.30 in the morning. I usually wake up late- by or after 9.00am, taking it easy since a month now. Soon it would be summer and it would be lit by 5.00am; so I enjoy the late mornings for now.

I had woken up completely disarrayed. It felt pretty warm for a foggy morning. My neck too seemed to be hardened. I had suffered of neck sprain for about 10 days. The pain was worse than the usual discomfort in the neck after we wake up in the morning. Maybe some tendons had ruptured. Although it was healed- it seemed more or less the same way. I couldn’t go back to sleep. That was way too strange. Usually, I wake up at 7.00 or 8.00 and then go off to snooze again- without even trying to.

~*~*~

I had dreamt of myself being posted somewhere in the open field- yet not exactly on the construction site, but very near to some office. There I had a couple of people reporting to me. I was the Incharge of that particular station. I felt thirsty while at work there and wanted to drink some; when I realized that we weren’t given the “filler bucket” yet. I had taken a huge offence to it. I had immediately wanted to know why the bucket was not handed over!

I had tried to look for a spare at the construction site. There wasn’t any. I had rushed to the office demanding for one. Nothing happened. I met some one who wanted to know what was the matter. While telling him how there wasn’t any “filler bucket” given for us and how we were unable to arrange for drinking water because of which; I had broken to sobs. I cried uncontrollably.

For crying out loud, it was only a bucket!

I woke up- disheveled..

~*~*~

I had just finished watching the movie and mocking at my maid for a few missing things. There, she then blurted out after a month that my old bucket that was filled with potted soil, placed under the staircase common area; was missing!

The ground-floor guys had made some construction repairs along the boundary wall only 2 weeks back. The bucket was placed in the stair- case area- not too far away from the actual construction area or my home at the 2nd floor. It was sat right in the middle space of both the spots (construction and my home)

It was a heavy iron-metal bucket from very old times. I had categorically sent my maid to get all the articles placed under the staircase area just after that incident. As she is- half deaf and rest forgetful; I ended up losing yet one of the things associated with my parents’ time.

  • I cried.

It then occurred to me- it was prophesied already!

My Dida’s Blessings

My maternal grandmother was stood in the garden area of my Manu masi’s (my mom’s sister) house waiting for me.

The only change was that the house appeared bigger. I wasn’t really friends with my dida. She came from one of the native village’s of West Bengal. She didn’t wear a blouse with her sari! She would cover her face (and not head alone), when my dad would be around. She definitely boasted about me given the fact that I was too good a student. I stood in ranks amongst the sections and also participated in extra- curricular activities. I was a bright kiddo!

The only time I had been to Calcutta (West Bengal), I got to verify the fact for myself. Most of the people at my mother’s maiden home knew me through my dida. All nice words were conveyed across to my maternal relatives. These were the people who I had met only once and would never ever get to meet. Some blood(y) relations I have.

I would often play around with her- making her slip into the lingeries. The poor woman would keep screaming in utmost scare thinking those to be the lewd outfits. She would never understand that those were inner- wear. She would hate staying at our home because we would insist her to wear a blouse – for all practical purposes. She hated us even though we made all the arrangements for her to chew betel leaf.

She would prefer staying at masi’s place where she slogged throughout the day, draping only a sari and keeping sick most of the time. The last time we had packed her in a taxi and brought her home, she would shriek the moment she would see me around with her medicines in my hand. She would freak out screaming “Bhani, your daughter is trying to poison me..” I was barely 14, yet would understand why she would say such whenever my uncle was around! Oh yes, they are directly related. My uncle happens to be my cousin maternal uncle.; however, his father and my dida are real siblings.

My dida passed away two or three years before my mom had. In similar situations- in the morning. I had been actively involved in her funeral arrangements. I had taken charge of my mom’s funeral too. Things that could not be taken care of during my dida’s funeral because of my age or relationship (I was only a grand daughter and in my teens), were taken care of elaborately at my mom’s funeral arrangement. I had almost asked my eldest masi to leave. I had picked up an argument with Manu masi too.

7th January, 2011

This was around the same time that my granny had passed away. I dreamt of her to be standing in the garden area of masi’s house and smiling at me. I had gone forward and touched her feet. She looked pretty healthy (she was petite) and in very good health. She spoke to me saying ” Don’t worry, all arrangements have been made, you’ll gain immensely thereof..” Even in my dream I was somewhat confused. That reminds me that I had taken my dida’s “last” foot imprints with aalta.

It was a present date dream since mom was missing. My masi looked as old as she is now. My cousin Runa was missing, who claimed to be the most caring one of the two of us.

I would have dismissed it as a mere co- incidence or sub- conscience thoughts- but why exactly around when she had died?

 

Strange encounter with a Minotaur

Dream Moods say that seeing one in your dream, denotes a union between your intelligence and your instincts. Alternatively, the dream refers to a situation in your waking life which may be larger than you can handle. You are feeling overwhelmed.

For New Moon, it symbolizes new beginnings.

Night of 9th August, 2010

It was a dark and dark bluish. I walked on the street and noticed a huge rush running in the direction opposite to my Walk. People were bewildered on the road. The street lights were so dim that human merely appeared as dark figures. They all ran scared of something or someone..

I saw a dark figure running towards us. It had horns on its head. Huge ones. Its face was triangular and it marched like a militant. I turned back and walked away..

I was in the bed gossiping with a few friends when I was insisting on something to be done the same night. The night following was supposedly a no moon night. That thing was to re- appear and so everyone needed to be cautious and warned. I was so insisting in playing up a bit before we all were to get panicky.

The night had went by. Without any more screams and runs. I had tucked in and slept peacefully. The next morning was peaceful, so was the night and the next day. And then the following night, I stood all alone. Everyone had seemed to have gone out of the town to save themselves of the wrath. I had so wanted to stay around and watchover.

I did not feel scared even a bit. It was Huge, dark and mystical. He looked right in me through my eyes. He did not attack me. It had stood as if a warrior would after his victory. I had felt enlightened watching a Minotaur in his face.

Yesterday was actually a no Moon night; now, waiting for the events to unfold themselves.

My Birthday today has been more than exciting so far..

Lets see what all it has in store for ME..

Broken pieces of Me..

~*~

“Mirror mirror on the wall,
Who’s the prettiest of them all..?”
It reflects upon what it sees,
It shows whatever is reflected on it.

Shines like a million diamonds
When light falls upon it,
At nights when its pitch dark,
It shows: How lifeless it can be.
It stands mutely up on that wall,
Staring at the ones who see in it all
It lets everyone take a peek;
Reflecting upon their image; the state of their being.
………………………………………
How beautifully it portrays the onlooker,
Without ever asking for a return of its favor.
It happily beams at the smile of the delightful
It sobs at the pain of the deplorable.
All it does is silently echo
All that emotions that you may wish to show
It never questions or makes judgements
Just listens to your words in great admiration

Even if it’s broken; it still retains its gloss,
Its ability to reflect; but with a few lines..
As if to express its dismay and grief;
A thousand times it reflects all that it sees..
Since Mirror’s unable to adjust with its reflection,
Each of its shards wait in retribution!
To prick the skin, making it bleed;
Smearing itself in the blood- with Conceit!!

~*~*~

How Mom celebrated my Birthday

This was when I worked with Baxy Infosol. I reported to Rachana in Toucan Mobile process. She is amongst the few shells that I could collect from a workplace where my tenure was very short as compared to other workplaces.

It was in June on 22nd night or 23rd early morning that I dreamt of this:

It was my Birthday (it falls in the month of August; why on earth I was dreaming of it in June remains a mystery). Even in dream, I was pretty aware of this fact that it was supposedly after a couple of months and not then. Yet mom (I had lost her many years back- but dreamt of her to be alive) was fluttering around everywhere possible to arrange for a Birhday Cake for me. I did ask her a few times what was she upto looking up for Bakery House cards; she didn’t reply and shooed me away 😦 I sadly coiled up in my room wondering why was Ma at all trying to look for a cake when my Birthday was no where around, not anytime soon.

She had spent the whole day searching the catalogues and calling up the bakery shops for a cake. Nirulas’ was apparently closed that day (!) She was now herself becoming a little upset on her inability to surprise me- since I had found out that she was trying to order a cake to surprise me; and she was unable to order one too. At the end of the day, she came to me and said, “My Dear, I have arranged a cake for you.. You just need to wait for some time..”

I woke up with mixed feelings; as confusing of them as I had felt while dreaming. Never the less, I dressed up and sat in my cab at 2pm for my evening shift. While I was walking through the walkway of the 2nd entrance gate- Harsh Israni (he worked with me as a Trainer in Convergys too) wished me “Happy Birthday”. Boy! was I Surprised. He didn’t believe when I told him it wasn’t the day. By the evening, we had all gathered up in the cafeteria for yet another colleague’s birthday. So far so good- “Mom had arranged for a cake for me”, I thought. Wait, till you read more.

They all sang “Happy Birthday to Olivia..!!??!!” and clapped and cheered while I was asked to blow out the candle on a very prettily decorated Strawberry Cake. I was as clueless as you are now. The other boy who was told that it was my birthday to walk him to cafeteria to surprise him, since his day was also being celebrated, had almost run out of cafeteria- Vipul Mongia, I guess. Reason being, it wasn’t his birthday as well; it was supposedly in December!!

The cake Rachana had ordered was very beautiful and different. It was not one of those regular ones; seemed it was ordered from a different place. It had all burgundy pink colored decorations sat on the icing- it was a very Royal Treatment to say the least. Harsh gave me a really annoying look at that.

After celebrating “My Birthday” as if it really were, I musingly narrated my dream to Rachana and one of my colleagues, Bhavna. Rachana was honored to say the least since it was she who got the cake as mom had wanted to in my Dream..!! Bhavana was surprised; so was I. They had all been trying to book a surprise on a different date..!!

  • Thanks Rachana..

Wonderfully, Rachana again celebrated my birthday in August; on 11th when it actually is..

In reality, mom could never run around to get anything for me and was only left to wait till dad or uncle got anything– if at all they did i.e., She wasn’t in a physical state to travel and arrange for anything. Financially, she wasn’t independent. She always said, “Celebrate such days once you start earning so you would not have to be on anyone’s mercy to enjoy any day that you so want. That ways, any day you could order for a cake and celebrate your day as Birthday or Christmas- whichever”. She was obstinate about this to an extent that she did not let me receive any gifts from my friends in later years. Yes, I felt bad- but now, I understand why this was so; very well.

Mom had not only arranged for the cake, but also made sure that my Birthday too was celebrated..

  • Thanks Ma..

2006- I was born; yet again on 23rd June..

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